# Tales of Stupid



## Grog12

A Place for those stories involving someone so stupid your ears started bleeding.


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## photoatdv

Okay since I asked for it I guess I should start it off...

How about the teacher that I told I'd programmed everything for the show already and had it saved... so she didn't get a tech to run lighting! Apparently she thought once you'd programmed it all you had to do was turn on the desk and it would run itself .


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## shiben

I dont know if this counts as stupid, or just rude, but today the LD and i were working with some gobo effects, trying to get a "hippie" look down with some glass gobos and rotators and whatnot. I was up on the ladder, which was positioned in the aisleway of our space, so that i could reach the light without getting on the fresh paint on the stage. He was at the board doing stuff, when the harpist for the orchestra walks in, and tries to move my ladder (the theater is the only accessible way to reach the auditorium stage. Its probably not ADA approved, but its an old space with no room for a new elevator). Needless to say, i was not pleased. Besides nearly getting me very injured, I could have also dropped a twin spin with 2 very expensive glass gobos in it to grab the pipe. She then proceeds to try and bring her harp onto the painted floor. Fortunately for her, she realized it was wet when she stepped on it. So I came down and got her a paint tray with water in it and a couple rags to clean her shoe off, meanwhile, she goes and walks all over the place, and nearly gets the ladder down (by dropping it, it got caught on a Source 4 somehow). This kind of belongs in the punching bag, but it sure seems like a nice tale of stupidity.


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## Raktor

shiben said:


> I dont know if this counts as stupid, or just rude, but today the LD and i were working with some gobo effects, trying to get a "hippie" look down with some glass gobos and rotators and whatnot. I was up on the ladder, which was positioned in the aisleway of our space, so that i could reach the light without getting on the fresh paint on the stage. He was at the board doing stuff, when the harpist for the orchestra walks in, and tries to move my ladder (the theater is the only accessible way to reach the auditorium stage. Its probably not ADA approved, but its an old space with no room for a new elevator). Needless to say, i was not pleased. Besides nearly getting me very injured, I could have also dropped a twin spin with 2 very expensive glass gobos in it to grab the pipe. She then proceeds to try and bring her harp onto the painted floor. Fortunately for her, she realized it was wet when she stepped on it. So I came down and got her a paint tray with water in it and a couple rags to clean her shoe off, meanwhile, she goes and walks all over the place, and nearly gets the ladder down (by dropping it, it got caught on a Source 4 somehow). This kind of belongs in the punching bag, but it sure seems like a nice tale of stupidity.


I've heard from a lot of my orchestra friends that most harpists are very pretentious... just reinforces the stereotype.


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## masterelectrician2112

Thank you for this forum. This needs to become an actual discussion topic right up there with the punching bag, lighting, what went wrong, etc.


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## chris325

A bit of stupidity on my part, I once spent 15 minutes trying to find out why I wasn't getting a feed in the headset, only to realize that the volume was down all the way. I even stumped someone else with it.

That, along with all the times I've accidentially overwritten the wrong cue on the Innovator.


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## shiben

Well, dont feel too bad. The Innovator doesnt need you being stupid to overwrite the wrong cue. You didnt really contribute too much. As for the harpest thing, I just wish that she had maybe looked up at the ladder, maybe to see if someone was, I dont know, ON IT!


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## marshmolly123

chris325 said:


> A bit of stupidity on my part, I once spent 15 minutes trying to find out why I wasn't getting a feed in the headset, only to realize that the volume was down all the way. I even stumped someone else with it.



I've definitely done that as well... Although the LD at the time was helpful enough to come over, turn up the volume, and call me a dumb*** 

A story of my own: one of our techs (actually "tech" is probably inaccurate, he just sort of shows up and annoys people once in a while) was trying to get a Source 4 up into the catwalk, but apparently was too weak to carry it up a ladder one-handed. We have a rope hanging down next to the ladder, so he decided to tie it to that and then haul it up (mind you the ladder is about 10 feet tall). I saw no problem with that, but reminded him to tie a bowline. He said of course he would, and next thing I know I hear a clatter of the light falling to the floor. He'd tied a slip not, defending it with "That's how I tie _my _bowlines!" :shock: Just glad I wasn't standing underneath it...


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## Les

marshmolly123 said:


> I've definitely done that as well... Although the LD at the time was helpful enough to come over, turn up the volume, and call me a dumb***
> 
> A story of my own: one of our techs (actually "tech" is probably inaccurate, he just sort of shows up and annoys people once in a while) was trying to get a Source 4 up into the catwalk, but apparently was too weak to carry it up a ladder one-handed. We have a rope hanging down next to the ladder, so he decided to tie it to that and then haul it up (mind you the ladder is about 10 feet tall). I saw no problem with that, but reminded him to tie a bowline. He said of course he would, and next thing I know I hear a clatter of the light falling to the floor. He'd tied a slip not, defending it with "That's how I tie _my _bowlines!" :shock: Just glad I wasn't standing underneath it...



In his defense, one-handed ladder climbing isn't a very smart thing to do, even if it is only 10' tall. Not that I didn't do similar things in my younger, less informed days


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## marshmolly123

Les said:


> In his defense, one-handed ladder climbing isn't a very smart thing to do, even if it is only 10' tall. Not that I didn't do similar things in my younger, less informed days



Perhaps -- it was the lack of bowline that concerned me. And the inability to ask how.


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## Les

marshmolly123 said:


> Perhaps -- it was the lack of bowline that concerned me. And the inability to ask how.




This is true!!! What's that saying... is it "the only stupid question is the one you didn't ask"? I think so!!!


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## rwhealey

We once had a client that was a pretty well known artist in his community. Their sound guy couldn't make it, so I was running sound. We had to rent FX processors. I got everything working before the show, but when it came to sound check, the reverb didn't work. The entire room was looking at me as I scrambled all over FOH, checking everything.

A minute later, I said "ah-ha!", reached over, and unpressed the bypass switch on the reverb, which I had pressed fifteen minutes earlier.

Oh, and all those times I swear I hear a change when I move the EQ knobs only to realize that the EQ is off...

Not quite the stupidest thing I've heard, but it made me feel like an idiot...

I've been told that the board needed to be moved on stage because of the delay due to the 100 feet of cabling. The delay... at the speed of light? There wasn't even a DSP in the equation...


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## shiben

rwhealey said:


> We once had a client that was a pretty well known artist in his community. Their sound guy couldn't make it, so I was running sound. We had to rent FX processors. I got everything working before the show, but when it came to sound check, the reverb didn't work. The entire room was looking at me as I scrambled all over FOH, checking everything.
> 
> A minute later, I said "ah-ha!", reached over, and unpressed the bypass switch on the reverb, which I had pressed fifteen minutes earlier.
> 
> Oh, and all those times I swear I hear a change when I move the EQ knobs only to realize that the EQ is off...
> 
> Not quite the stupidest thing I've heard, but it made me feel like an idiot...
> 
> I've been told that the board needed to be moved on stage because of the delay due to the 100 feet of cabling. The delay... at the speed of light? There wasn't even a DSP in the equation...



You my friend have experienced the wonderful qualities of "Frobbing", when an annoying piece of "Talent" wants something changed, you pretend to fiddle with the knobs, and because they see you doing something, they hear a change. Its wonderful with the more annoying indie guys who feel the need to have everything "exactly right".


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## edmedmoped

Not very 'stupid', more funny, but I didn't want to make a new thread.

We did a 'stars in their eyes' type performance at our school. Before each act, there was a short clip about who they were going to be. For this, the act before needs to come off, the projector screen needs to come down and the dvd needs to be played.

At the end of an act, the tabs needed to be closed as it was the penultimate act, so they closed as the projector screen came down, and they both collided, making the screen crease. The guy that was running tabs then panicked and brought them back in and then waited for the screen to come all the way down before he tried again.

He got the call to send them out, and tried to turn the handle but couldn't and preceded to shout down cans "they're broken, they're broken!". He then realised he was turning the handle the wrong way.

All was well in the end though


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## SteveB

A condition for this thread is that stories involving musicians and/or band members including the drummer, don't count, as we could set a record for number of posts and crash the CB server.

SB


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## misterm

Just yesterday we were setting up our LEDs for the homecoming pageant and i was training some of my new techies. So many moments of "duh" even for non-experienced techs. "What I do with this?" asks one as he grabs the extension cord I point to. "Um, plug it into the outlet...." He runs off, comes back a few moments later, "Do what, again?" He mostly bumbled around, complaining or talking about all of his ideas.


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## ReiRei

I've seen some stupid stuff but I think the funniest stupid moment I've ever experienced was during my first show junior year. We were doing Little Shop of Horrors. Before every show we check the lights to make sure none of them are burnt out or have bad connections, etc. During one of the LSoH shows a light burnt out right after intermission. The light tech and I noticed and we both were kinda irritated that it went out but hey, what can you do. The ME voiced his concern, "darn. That light went out" and the sm looks over at both of us, "What do you mean?" So I said, "Well, the lamp burnt out." She then goes on to say, "I thought you checked them." and the lighting tech answers with, "yeah, and they were all working fine then." She said, "Wait, so you're telling me that even if you check the lights before the show they can still go out?"

She was serious.

I couldn't even hold myself back from laughing at her.


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## seanandkate

I was at the house of my (ex) girlfriend's parents, and when told that I was a theatre Lighting Designer, her mother was astonished: "Don't they just flick a switch or something?"

Shortly thereafter I was dating my new girlfriend / future wife -- a stage manager. A cautionary tale about dating outside of the tribe, people . . .


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## Les

seanandkate said:


> I was at the house of my (ex) girlfriend's parents, and when told that I was a theatre Lighting Designer, her mother was astonished: "Don't they just flick a switch or something?"
> 
> Shortly thereafter I was dating my new girlfriend / future wife -- a stage manager. A cautionary tale about dating outside of the tribe, people . . .



I have a few cautionary tales of dating within the tribe, myself 

hey, whatever works!!!


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## misterm

misterm said:


> Just yesterday we were setting up our LEDs for the homecoming pageant and i was training some of my new techies. So many moments of "duh" even for non-experienced techs. "What I do with this?" asks one as he grabs the extension cord I point to. "Um, plug it into the outlet...." He runs off, comes back a few moments later, "Do what, again?" He mostly bumbled around, complaining or talking about all of his ideas.



Alright, same kid today....we're hanging the LEDs around the gym for homecoming DANCE. I notice he has a LOT of slack in the cables run between each fixture, which are just simple par64s, no movers, scanners, nothing. I asked him why there was so much slack and that he needed to move the fixture down more. his reply? "well we need the slack for when the light moves."


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## calkew5

On a recent production, my director complained that our run lights were visible from backstage during an important blackout. His solution: he tells the actors to unplug them right before the blackout. Let's stop for a second and think about what run lights are for...


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## rochem

calkew5 said:


> On a recent production, my director complained that our run lights were visible from backstage during an important blackout.



Almost every running light I've ever come across has been visible from backstage.


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## Jinglish

Well, here's a story of my own stupidity: This summer, after some renovations had taken place in my high school's theater (just new house lights and sound baffling), I came in the theater a few times to check things out. Unfortunately, I couldn't get the lights to work. I figured the dimmer rack had just been disconnected from its power supply for some reason during the renovations, but it was on and I was able to turn the lights on from the rack. The Innovator's patching was perfectly normal, so I had no idea what was going on.

Then I realized that the grand master was at 0%.

In my defense, I _never_ use that thing except during fadeouts of scenes involving more than one submaster. My directors do whenever they use the board, but I really don't see the point of taking the master down when I have all the channel and sub sliders down and the dimmers automatically go to 0 on board shutdown anyway.


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## Clifford

You should bring it down because it drives some of us crazy.


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## marshmolly123

misterm said:


> "well we need the slack for when the light moves."



Perhaps he meant so you could aim them?


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## JChenault

I wish there was a way to disable the grand master during performances.

I'm sitting there on opening night for Secret Garden where I designed the lighting. The show is pretty dim - but I did not make it THAT dim. It is so bad I consider getting out of my seat and seeing what is wrong - but I unwisely took a seat in the middle of the aisle.

At intermission I go to the light booth and see that the Grand Master is at 70%. Second act looked a lot better.

Sigh


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## ptero

JChenault said:


> I wish there was a way to disable the grand master during performances.
> 
> I'm sitting there on opening night for Secret Garden where I designed the lighting. The show is pretty dim - but I did not make it THAT dim. It is so bad I consider getting out of my seat and seeing what is wrong - but I unwisely took a seat in the middle of the aisle.
> 
> At intermission I go to the light booth and see that the Grand Master is at 70%. Second act looked a lot better.
> 
> Sigh




Totally identical story w/a show I designed. Lit it, opening night, sitting in the middle of a row, GM at 70% for act one. And it was a dim show to start with. wow.

On the ETC console at that theatre you can, and we did, disable the GM. It has remained disabled ever since. Maybe 5 years now. No one has any reason to need it in that space.


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## rochem

Clifford said:


> You should bring it down because it drives some of us crazy.



Wait, are you saying you prefer for someone to bring down the GM when you're going home at the end of the day? What possible advantages would this have? I personally hate it when people do this, because if I'm using the RFR from the deck, I don't want to have to run all the way up to the booth just to bring up the GM before I can bring up channels.


ptero said:


> On the ETC console at that theatre you can, and we did, disable the GM. It has remained disabled ever since. Maybe 5 years now. No one has any reason to need it in that space.



On the Express we have at school, the Blackout button can be disabled, but the GM seemingly cannot. We always disable the blackout button before going into techs, but its really annoying to suddenly notice that the GM had been bumped down a little bit halfway through a show. I almost always program a GM into the Eos before techs just in case they need to use it, but I always get rid of it before final dress.


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## cprted

calkew5 said:


> On a recent production, my director complained that our run lights were visible from backstage during an important blackout. His solution: he tells the actors to unplug them right before the blackout. Let's stop for a second and think about what run lights are for...


Its actually not uncommon to dowse the run lights for a blackout if there is a lot of spill from the wings. If everyone on deck knows its coming, then they can plan their movements accordingly.


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## edmedmoped

B&Q sold me duct tape advertised as gaffer tape


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## mstaylor

This was many moons ago, I was eighteen and SM a major musical for the local community players group. The lighting board was located in the SR wing. We bring up the first scene, everything looks fine. The Director, a local legend, sends a note back that the lights are too dark. The board op tells me she is running the cues as written so I tell her not to worry about it. Scene two, same thing. Scene three another note, so I decide I am going to FOH to find out what is going on. I see the producer who asks what's up, so I tell her. She says she will handle it so I go back to the stage. The producer goes and asks what is going on, to which the director says the stage is dark and I won't fix it. The producer told her to take her sunglasses off.


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## aemeeich

rochem said:


> On the Express we have at school, the Blackout button can be disabled, but the GM seemingly cannot. We always disable the blackout button before going into techs, but its really annoying to suddenly notice that the GM had been bumped down a little bit halfway through a show. I almost always program a GM into the Eos before techs just in case they need to use it, but I always get rid of it before final dress.



The GM certainly can be disabled on the Express as I just did it to my 72/144 this past week. The GM was starting to get a little flaky - you'd have to push the fader sideways to get it to register, otherwise it would drop to 0. It started off not too bad - it'd happen once in a great while, I'd slide it up and down a few times, and then it would be fine for a while. However, this past week during tech rehearsals, I couldn't get it to stay at 100% at all. I was starting to worry as the show opened on Friday and there wasn't enough time to get it fixed. I was walking across the stage doing some other work, when I had an "Ah Ha" moment and I remembered seeing a menu option that would disable the GM. I started looking through the menus and found where it was. Score! So the show went off fine, and I will be making a trip over to Middleton (since it's only about 45 minutes away - shame on me for not taking care of this problem sooner) one of these days to have the GM fixed, and one other channel fader that doesn't go any lower than 4%.

Anyways, to change the function of the GM
Go to System Settings page
#10 - Master Type
Your options are
0-Fully Disabled
1-Grandmaster
2-Sub Grandmaster
3-Scenemaster

It's on page 19 of the owners manual.

Michael


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## gcpsoundlight

I've done some stupid things...

1) - Planning for a formal, I forgot to check with the other lighting guy how many Par56 cans he had. I thought 16, actually 4!! Subsequent calls to the hire company resulted.
2) - Same gig, as I was patching the desk (maxim S), I had covered up the extra functions under the faders. I then spent 30mins trying to find the patch button!
3) - this one is not mine, but i think it has to go up. Working on a medium sized show, the LD hired 4x 4 Par 64 bars with looms. Trouble is, the loom is the same for regular (240v) cabling, as it is for the pars (120v). $350 on globes later, and it was only when I dug around in the cable box and found the right end that he realised what he had done!
4) This one is kind of ironic. Jamming on my guitar running on a mackie desk into some decent computer speakers (too cheap to by an amp!) I thought, "The Music is not loud enough!". Play a power chord, BANG and the amp made my room smell like the magic smoke for the rest of the week!

So there is my contribution to the stories.


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## shiben

As for the running light question, at least put them on a dimmer so that you dont need to bust out the flashlight to get the plug back in. Or have someone man the switch, or something. Just pulling plugs is gonna result in badness. On a stupidity note, once a guy that I worked with had to explain to the orchestra director that a person needed to go up and move each light, because the director assumed that they moved themselves. After going up in the lift, he started understanding.


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## WestlakeTech

Not sure if I've already mentioned this on CB, but here goes...

So last year, we had our "Holiday Spectacular show" at my high school. Since our PAC was undergoing renovation, we were using the gym, and not as much or as good equipment as we usually would. However, we had one problem that just baffled me...

The show would finish when some girls in Rockette-ish costumes performed a dance in front of four christmas trees, complete with lights. One night, only one of the trees lit up and it just looked really stupid. What's the problem?

Well, 3 of the trees were plugged into a very short three-receptacle extension cord, and that was plugged into the quad box at the back of the stage. The one tree that was on was plugged directly into the quad box. (all of the lighting cords could have reached the quad box) So when the ext. somehow came out during a scene change, nobody realized it until it was too late and only one set of lights was plugged in. Are you thinking what I'm thinking? FOUR trees... FOUR receptacles in a QUAD box... so who had the brilliant idea of using the extension cord?!!!! 

Then again, my high school doesn't teach rocket science...


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## photoatdv

That sounds about right.  We pulled a few moves like that laying cables the other day... but more the kind that took us time, not screwed anything up. I liked this one. The venue was lowering the pit after we'd set mics. I was going to ride down on it to watch the cables, but the head guy said not to because it would take a while for me to walk back up (it is a long route from the bottom of the pit to the house). So we stay in the house and hold the cables... then remember we don't have a mic in position because we needed it clear when the pit moved. So then we get to walk from house to pit and back


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## gcpsoundlight

Some of our Jure-Rigged stuff would make occupational health and safety people cry! We have to climb a 1 + 1/2 foot wide ladder to get to the booth where there is, horror of horror, a 24/48 jands event !!!(!!!!!!!!). And, sometimes the DMX cuts out, which is because someone "Tried" to hard wire the DMX to the dimmer. Oh well, S*** happens!


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## LxBoardOP

This is a tale of my own stupidity


Ok, I get into the booth after school, and decide to turn the house lights and works lights on. I'm pushing the Sub masters up for them both thinking "Come on why isnt this working" my boards on, and everything. So I'm watching my screen, then I look down and see the GM slider is down"I'm an idiot", so of course I put it to ten, and I can see the one actor who was on time...


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## MarshallPope

This is involving a church sound system and a funeral which I was not scheduled to work, but heard many stories. In our sanctuary, the amps are located in a hole between the organ and the stage (Don't ask me why) and need to be switched on from that location before going back to the sound booth (or cabinet, as some brilliant person decided to abandon the booth in the balcony and place a custom table/cabinet creation in the walkway behind the middle section of pews). Anyway, off of that soapbox, the sound guy for the day went back to the booth, turned everything on right before the start of the funeral, and waited until the preacher got on stage to start. But for some reason, no sound is coming out. Sound guy proceeds to push faders up, with no success. Within a few seconds, everything applicable is up to 100%. About this time, Helpful Person realizes that the amps are probably not turned on, goes over, and flips the switch. From what I have been told, this resulted in the worst squeal in memory and there were most likely a few deaf ears for the first few minutes of the funeral service.


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## MillburyAuditorium

Well, my first one is kind of strange, 

I walk into the theater one afternoon and find my sound guy disgruntled and confused by the sound board, I walk over and ask whats wrong, he says "The Solo buttons aren't working." So I first go behind the board to make sure the headphones are in fact plugged in, seeing they are, i return tot he front and look at the board. I press the Mute button off and turn the Phone/Control Room knob up 
I learn later he spent all day looking for the manual online and tryign different things. And hes been with us for 5 years 0_0


Ahhhh Maintenance people, where do I begin? 
More the punching bag though,
Well, we recently got a new Vice Principal, who happens to be a Theater Major, so she is all game for anything we want to do, she wants to get us a real control room and what not, but that not being logical at the moment she is open for any ideas, so I get a hold of my friend who is the Engineering Department head's intern and knows a lot about building and what not, so he comes into the space, measure and makes up something for me in CAD, He gets me the wood i would need, and I go down to our towns local wood company, and the cost is a meager 100 dollars, this isn't going to be much, but we will slowly add things to it to make it my complete as money trickles in.
I show the Vice-Principal and shes all excited and everything is go, then Mr.I'm going to annoy everyone maintenance man comes in, and starts barking about how it would be blocking the egress path and how the space is for wheelchairs.
Problem number 1. The rear crossover is not supposed to be an egress path says our fire escape plans, and also, think of this. there, like many places, are two main entrances, at the head of both aisles of seats, in between the middle and side sections, so if you want to use the rear crossover, you literally have to be 2.5 feet next to a main exit :/ both doors go to the same open lobby as well.
Problem Number 2. The area he says is for wheelchairs is not, for wheelchairs, A. We have been there the last 8 years, B, I can show him the room plans, there are designated handicap seating at the front of the house, note the wheelchair lift on the stage right stairs.
So while he is blabbing on about things he thinks wont be done I can see the vice principal rolling her eyes : ) It sort of made me happy.

And originally we planned to remove the rear row of seats, which since their is a cut in in the aisle for control, there is a total of 10 seats in the whole back row, other than maybe 22 like the rest, he says he doesnt want to take them out because it "Destroys them" and htey cant be put back in. If oyu cant re-attach a seat to the floor then theres a problem.
B., No one is ever allowed to sit there in the first place, so even if they cant be replaced, who cares? We would only gain standing room.

Well, sorry for running on!


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## LxBoardOP

Well, I have two stories

Story number one: This happened to our light tech before i got to the school, well she was doing something and all of a sudden our stage goes black, our LD/TD runs up to the booth to see what went wrong. When he gets there he sees that the GM slider had been slidden down, this was the Lx Board Operator's first play. It was funny, we are no longer alowed to sign anything and have it on the Lx Board.

Story number two: Last year durring a orcestra, and orchestra winds concert my sister, and our assistant tech director were on stage playing a song, and up in the catwalks they hear a pop, well being a techie and the Light board op at the time my sister wonders what it could be, well months past we are hanging lights for our spring musical, a source 4 19 wouldnt turn on so we check the bulb, as we open it up, we find the base of the bulb and the glass completely gone, no remains, we dont know who did it, but we are pretty sure it was the band teacher, yeah we were astounded.


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## MillburyAuditorium

So the play season is starting up, so whilst hanging lights and cleaning everything, I hear one of the new actors yell

"I can't wait to be in the lemon light!"

Almost dropped a light laughing 





You know, lime...lemon, get it? heh


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## edmedmoped

MillburyAuditorium said:


> So the play season is starting up, so whilst hanging lights and cleaning everything, I hear one of the new actors yell
> 
> "I can't wait to be in the lemon light!"
> 
> Almost dropped a light laughing
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> You know, lime...lemon, get it? heh


I have a band called lemonlight! hahah


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## Soxred93

I've had someone ask me if I had an XLR extension cord before...


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## Les

LxBoardOP said:


> Well, I have two stories
> 
> Story number one: This happened to our light tech before i got to the school, well she was doing something and all of a sudden our stage goes black, our LD/TD runs up to the booth to see what went wrong. When he gets there he sees that the GM slider had been slidden down, this was the Lx Board Operator's first play. It was funny, we are no longer alowed to sign anything and have it on the Lx Board.
> 
> Story number two: Last year durring a orcestra, and orchestra winds concert my sister, and our assistant tech director were on stage playing a song, and up in the catwalks they hear a pop, well being a techie and the Light board op at the time my sister wonders what it could be, well months past we are hanging lights for our spring musical, a source 4 19 wouldnt turn on so we check the bulb, as we open it up, we find the base of the bulb and the glass completely gone, no remains, we dont know who did it, but we are pretty sure it was the band teacher, yeah we were astounded.



I had a hard time following your first story. 

As for the second story,
No one "did it". It's called a Super Nova and it isn't an extremely uncommon lamp failure. The remains are probably in the lens tube.


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## TheDonkey

Soxred93 said:


> I've had someone ask me if I had an XLR extension cord before...



Haha, I can see myself asking that, then being like...wait...nevermind...


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## WestlakeTech

Well there's this new stooge teaching a Tech class at my old high school (and he has ZERO experience outside of high school and college). While teaching the Tech2 class how to replace an ERS lamp, he broke the lamp as he was re-attaching the back end to the fixture. So then he put in another lamp... and broke that one the exact same way. 2 lamps in just a few minutes... and they both had such potential.


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## Les

Sad day. $50.00 easy come, easy go, right


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## Anvilx

WestlakeTech said:


> Well there's this new stooge teaching a Tech class at my old high school (and he has ZERO experience outside of high school and college). While teaching the Tech2 class how to replace an ERS lamp, he broke the lamp as he was re-attaching the back end to the fixture. So then he put in another lamp... and broke that one the exact same way. 2 lamps in just a few minutes... and they both had such potential.



Didn't the guy you had before leave to go work at the Long Center?


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## zuixro

I've spent a while trying to get a cue to come up, only to realize that the grandmaster is down. (for some reason, they insist that we pull the GM down before we turn off the board. Even though Emphasis clears everything out when you shut it down...)

Also, people start a new file on the server, then can't get anything to work. The patch in our default new file is blank. So every time I have to run up to the booth and set the patch to 1:1.


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## Jackalope

Funny, We had the same board and the same problem recently. we've upgraded with the new theater so it hasn't been issue


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## WestlakeTech

Anvilx said:


> Didn't the guy you had before leave to go work at the Long Center?



He isn't a teacher. He's a facilities manager (at least for us). But no. He WAS at the Long Center for a little over a year before a new WHS job was created for him so that he could come back.


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## shiben

WestlakeTech said:


> He isn't a teacher. He's a facilities manager (at least for us). But no. He WAS at the Long Center for a little over a year before a new WHS job was created for him so that he could come back.



So if I understand this correctly, the dude you had working there and then left and then got hired back still cant replace an ERS lamp? Also, what do you learn in tech 1? Im just curious here, it seems kind of funny to me that any tech (i even know a hum head who can) cant replace a lamp in an ERS.


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## Anvilx

shiben said:


> Im just curious here, it seems kind of funny to me that any tech (i even know a hum head who can) cant replace a lamp in an ERS.



I must confess at my school I am the only student who knows how to replace lamps except for two of my friends who I taught and the teacher. But then again I am the only one who knows about a lot of things. (Everyone else take tech theater for an easy A)


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## WestlakeTech

shiben said:


> So if I understand this correctly, the dude you had working there and then left and then got hired back still cant replace an ERS lamp? Also, what do you learn in tech 1? Im just curious here, it seems kind of funny to me that any tech (i even know a hum head who can) cant replace a lamp in an ERS.



No, but I'll clarify.

Once upon a time, there were 2 Tech Teachers, and 1 Facilities Manager. When the faclities manager left, one of the tech teachers was given the job. As the Old FM came back, instead of having him replace the guy who replaced him, they created a new job for him. And he hired one of his old students (quite un-necessarily) who now teaches Tech2. THAT guy is the Tech2 teacher who knows how to replace a lamp, he just thinks he's skilled enough to do it as fast as he can without even thinking. Kinda complicated, I know...

In the state of texas, all students in high school are required to get 1 Fine Arts credit. So many students take Tech1 thinking it will be a blow-off class. So the more in-depth stuff is saved for Tech 2 while Tech 1 is nothing but the most basic of basics. Trust me, you do NOT wanna see Tech 1s with lighting instruments. MY tech 1 class took the term "strike" literally. Instead of carefully taking apart the Peter Pan set, they took a bunch of sledgehammers and mallets to it in some sort of punk demolition frenzy before my teacher realized what was going on. (hey, another tale of the stupid!)


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## shiben

Thats why you call it the "out" or "load out" or something similar. That way, the teamsters and IA guys dont pull out signs, and the actors/other non-techies dont get sledgehammers and do their thing with those. Actually, in a funny quasi-related story, we had one girl who, when told that all theatre company members had to show up for strike, asked what it was (this is her 2nd year in the company, she ought to know, so the other crew heads and I didnt feel bad). We told her it was where we all got signs and stood around in front of the admin building demanding better wages. We also told her to dress warm and wear comfortable shoes, because it could take a few weeks. She actually brought a sign to the out. It was epic fun, and we gave her an easy job because she took us seriously.

As a serious note to all educators/crew heads in an educational setting: How hard do you think tech theatre classes should be? I am currently in favor of more difficult ones, because the ones I have taken so far so easy that I can not show up and get an A. Most of the ones I have been in so far are basically "this is a Source 4. THis is a screwdriver. This is a table saw. Memorize and write down on test". Anyone else think we should make tech theatre 1 classes hard?


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## ajb

shiben said:


> As a serious note to all educators/crew heads in an educational setting: How hard do you think tech theatre classes should be? I am currently in favor of more difficult ones, because the ones I have taken so far so easy that I can not show up and get an A. Most of the ones I have been in so far are basically "this is a Source 4. THis is a screwdriver. This is a table saw. Memorize and write down on test". Anyone else think we should make tech theatre 1 classes hard?


 Well, the trick is that you often have to serve vastly ranging skill levels within a single tech class. For instance, my college's intro to tech class was the only purely technical class that was required for all drama, musical theatre, and vocal performance majors. As such, in a single class there were people like me, winding up with a course average of >100%, and others taking it for the second, third, or even fourth (!!) time and still failing. What do you do in a situation like that? You can't simply make it harder, knowing that more students will fail. You can try to better motivate the performance concentrators, but many of them feel the same way about tech theatre as many of the posters here feel, I imagine, about singing or acting. Of course, now we're talking about stuff best put in the education forum, so suffice to say it's often a delicate balancing act that has to be looked at in the context of the program overall and the goals and abilities of the student population.


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## len

Isn't there some state or local standard that has to be taught to?


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## GrayeKnight

> "this is a Source 4. THis is a screwdriver. This is a table saw. Memorize and write down on test".


That's more that my tech theatre teacher (high school) does in his tech one/two/three classes... combined. I'd pay to have him give a tools test, let alone tell people what a Source 4 is. 

Our midterm exam? Write a ten minute play about a contemporary issue facing society. Am I in Tech? I forgot..

Here's a tale of stupid: My tech teacher allowing our backdrop to be painted black. Oh yeah, because that's easy to light. And paint over.


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## shiben

GrayeKnight said:


> That's more that my tech theatre teacher (high school) does in his tech one/two/three classes... combined. I'd pay to have him give a tools test, let alone tell people what a Source 4 is.
> 
> Our midterm exam? Write a ten minute play about a contemporary issue facing society. Am I in Tech? I forgot..
> 
> Here's a tale of stupid: My tech teacher allowing our backdrop to be painted black. Oh yeah, because that's easy to light. And paint over.



First of all, thats what velour is for, black backdrops. 2, why is any playwriting going on in a tech class?

Three, how can you call it tech and not at least mention the source 4? its either the 1st or 2nd most common lighting instrument in existence right now, and easily the most prevalent modern instrument. When was the last time you saw a professional show with anything other than S4s or Selpacs (and even then, S4s are wayyyyyy more common)?


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## GrayeKnight

Well, we don't have any black velour curtains, we have a plaster backdrop and an upstage traveller (~3 feet from upstage wall) which we use. The schools singing competition wanted to paint the backdrop black and write on it with gold letters, and my wonderful tech teacher said that would be a great idea! And let them do it. 

Technically, although i call it a theatre, it is an auditorium. No fly system, and we have to _fight_ to make our shows look the way they do. 

As far as the playwriting thing goes, its something that is getting on my nerves to no end, and one of the main reasons why I'm ready to get out of my high school at the end of this year. My tech theatre teacher is a community director in my area, and also teaches one or two theatre classes at my school. Another student and I know more than he does about tech, because she worked in a professional theatre last summer. We end up teaching our class, and also perform maintenance on our space since the mechanics in our district don't maintain it. Although he knows basic things because he is a director and has worked in the industry, he does not teach tech. He makes an appearance at the beginning and end of class, and on days when he teaches we do theatre games, theatre playwriting activities, and other stuff like that. 

His "supervisor", the head theatre teacher, and him are best friends so since our administration generally avoids the fine arts department nothing is being done about his position. 

I have no words for what happens in this fine arts department. It's aggravating to no end.

Another funny story: After two work orders and a year, the district maintenance people came out to our auditorium to change our houselights (over half of them were burned out) and after they walked in they informed me that the lights were, and i quote, "too high up for them to change". And they left the box of lightbulbs for us. Needless to say, i ended up changing all 30+ lightbulbs with a telescoping light bulb changer and these crazy new things called ladders, which our maintenance people apparently didn't know existed.


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## Les

GrayeKnight said:


> Technically, although i call it a theatre, it is an auditorium. No fly system, and we have to _fight_ to make our shows look the way they do.



A little terminology correction needed. A fly system does not a theatre make. 

A Theatre is the entire performance venue, including dressing rooms, technical facilities, lobby, box office, etc. The auditorium is where the audience is seated. So in essence, all theatres (excluding studio/blackbox spaces) have an auditorium.


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## derekleffew

Les, see Auditorium, definition #2. While I agree with you that "a fly system does not a theatre make," the distinction between theatre and auditorium is not so clear.

One of my favorite spaces has always been the Auditorium Theatre. 
Then there's the building on the campus of Miami University, Hall Auditorium, which even though it contains classrooms, was so named because everyone thought Hall Hall sounded silly. I guess the secondary definition of "hall," as a place of assembly, escaped them.
http://www.controlbooth.com/forums/members/les.html


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## GrayeKnight

Les said:


> A little terminology correction needed. A fly system does not a theatre make.
> 
> A Theatre is the entire performance venue, including dressing rooms, technical facilities, lobby, box office, etc. The auditorium is where the audience is seated. So in essence, all theatres (excluding studio/blackbox spaces) have an auditorium.



Ah, yes. You make a valid point. The reason i normally call it an auditorium to people who aren't students who work with me is because (especially in our school district) administrators and maintenance will correct me when i say theatre because they really want it to be known that it's multipurpose... i guess. Just a habit. Our school system is interesting to say the least.

And yeah, a fly system isn't necessary to have a theatre. Shiben said thats what velour curtains were for, and i just wanted to explain (albeit indirectly) that it wasn't easy for us to change any soft goods on stage.


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## MillburyAuditorium

Well, the Janitors strike again! I 'work' in a high school, well if you want the full story, see the punching bag.

Long story short, the maintenance department called in a $6000 theatrical lighting company in that arranged lighting to the best it can be for whats readily at hand, checks lighting systems, and what not...TO DUST LIGHTS. Give me a can of air and I would of done it myself... They didn't even do a good job..


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## shiben

GrayeKnight said:


> Ah, yes. You make a valid point. The reason i normally call it an auditorium to people who aren't students who work with me is because (especially in our school district) administrators and maintenance will correct me when i say theatre because they really want it to be known that it's multipurpose... i guess. Just a habit. Our school system is interesting to say the least.
> 
> And yeah, a fly system isn't necessary to have a theatre. Shiben said thats what velour curtains were for, and i just wanted to explain (albeit indirectly) that it wasn't easy for us to change any soft goods on stage.



Oh, I understand, we dont have battens either. Tying on 240' of 100% fullness velour drape in the black box was so much fun i nearly jumped off the ladder. The main point was that painting an otherwise useful backdrop black is kind of pointless, unless there is a good reason for it, seeing as velour works better, and especially if its a PITA to change it out for a new good one.


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## GrayeKnight

I liked last year for our production of West Side Story, where our director (the aforementioned tech teacher) wanted to have our grand drape moved to our traveler position because for the dance scene he wanted to have the gold curtain backdrop. 

Not only was it a pain unhooking/bringing down/moving/bringing up/hanging the curtian via scaffolding, but we also stretched out our traveler pull rope so much (and broke the track) that now the ropes hang down in front of the traveler when closed, and the two pieces of track swing back and forth when it is closed. And our grand drape has 6 or seven nice holes in it, since it was moving up against a chain link fence that was part of our set. 

Anyway... yeah the backdrop is being painted black because they want to write "Providence Idol 2010" on it in gold letters. And they expect me to light it. What i don't think they understand is that with the 40 channels (including catwalk, 3 electrics, and our floor pockets) i don't have enough to light the stage and the backdrop. 

I have 6 striplights, no cyc lights, and no available batten or electric to hang 3 of the strip lights on in order to correctly light the words from the top and bottom. (Our strip lights are so dim that even on our white cyc from the floor they light 1/2 the way up.)


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## WestlakeTech

ANYWAY... back to tales of stupid...


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## GrayeKnight

Haha, that was my bad. 

/rant


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## willbb123

The other day I watched a crew member try to fly out our motorized electrics. She wasn't paying attention, and pushed the down button. Electrics 2 & 3 came in about a foot then stopped cause they were in all the way. She then told me that they were broken. I then explained that she was pushing the down button.


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## PeytonJr

My costumer was telling me this story:

She had been getting annoyed at everyone for not putting all their costumes back on hangers and just leaving them out on the table, so she made an announcement to actors that they absolutely need to put everything away. We have a Trunk of Shame that costumes go in if they aren't put away, and the actor has to find the costumer and do various things to get it back. So one of the actors apparently took it way too far. They had hung all their costumes up, except for a hat, which was on the table. I really am not sure of the thought process, but she ended up cutting a hole in the top of the hat so that she could put it on a hangar. This was basically the ultimate face-palm. So the costumer fixes it up the best she could, and continues with everything.
Today the actor at the end of rehearsal says "hey, for some reason the top of my hat is coming undone..."
We were just, "oh, now how could that be?"


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## NickVon

aemeeich said:


> The GM certainly can be disabled on the Express as I just did it to my 72/144 this past week. The GM was starting to get a little flaky - you'd have to push the fader sideways to get it to register, otherwise it would drop to 0. It started off not too bad - it'd happen once in a great while, I'd slide it up and down a few times, and then it would be fine for a while. However, this past week during tech rehearsals, I couldn't get it to stay at 100% at all. I was starting to worry as the show opened on Friday and there wasn't enough time to get it fixed. I was walking across the stage doing some other work, when I had an "Ah Ha" moment and I remembered seeing a menu option that would disable the GM. I started looking through the menus and found where it was. Score! So the show went off fine, and I will be making a trip over to Middleton (since it's only about 45 minutes away - shame on me for not taking care of this problem sooner) one of these days to have the GM fixed, and one other channel fader that doesn't go any lower than 4%.
> 
> Anyways, to change the function of the GM
> Go to System Settings page
> #10 - Master Type
> Your options are
> 0-Fully Disabled
> 1-Grandmaster
> 2-Sub Grandmaster
> 3-Scenemaster
> 
> It's on page 19 of the owners manual.
> 
> Michael



Is this possible on an Insight 1? as i've looked around but never found an option


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## dcollins

Looking at the manual, I don't see a way.


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